English Really is Crazy

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,

But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!

Let's face it, English is a crazy language! In closing:

If Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop!?

You Think English is Easy?

Was writing the other day and found I'd written this:  She placed the end of the compression bandage over the wound and wound it around his leg.

At a quick glance I thought I'd repeated myself, until I read the whole sentence. It reminded me of this list I have showing how strange english is. I never thought I'd actually end up writing one myself :-)

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce.

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the Present.

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

For more examples of how crazy English can be, visit here.

Aussie Slang

I love Aussie slang. I think it shows who we are, our culture and gives us individuality. A personal peeve is the way Australian's are giving up our own language for an international American based one. Grrrrr.

So it's probably no surprise my hero is a true blue Aussie bloke. But how far can I go with the inclusion of Aussie idioms? I'd love to be able to include a glossary of terms at the start - but I don't think Harlequin would like that. Instead I'm trying to find that balance between identifying my hero (in part) as an Aussie through his language (he has to explain himself as my heroine is American - so the reader isn't left scratching her head) and not driving everyone bonkers by using a 'foreign' language, lol.

If you want a good site for Aussie slang go here.

I know I use a lot of them as I discovered when I was overseas and realised how often people looked at me blankly when I finished speaking *grin*.

I'm glad to be a ridgy-didge Aussie.

The English Language

A friend of mine has been blogging recently about the strangulation of the English language. I thought I'd add to her observations with a few of my own.

I have a number of gripes, but one of the biggest is the onslaught of technology and the intrusion it has made into our language. I have no problem with technology such as SMS (use it myself) but the abbreviations that go with it bug me.

B4 U ST8 UR CASE 4 TXTSPK, IMHO IT RLY MAKES 4 SLOPPY HABITS. WELL TWIT.
Before you state your case for text speak, in my honest opinion it really makes for sloppy habits. Well that's what I think.

And now it's appearing in business names, advertising and emails - just to name a few spots. Grrrrr.

And don't get me started on the fact that kids these days don't see a problem in announcing they are going to play with someone elses Wii!